Get Out of ADHD Stuck

No one welcomes those times when things don’t go as hoped or planned, or when a situation occurs or persists that feels like an attack or threat to their well-being. It’s more likely that we expect things will go our way, and are surprised, and feel threatened, when they don’t.

ADHD stuck is when you don’t like where you are but you can’t imagine how to get out; your thinking is black/white; your perspective is limited; you’re stuck in a mindset with rules you don’t even know you have.

Finding your place to stand in a time of challenge is in itself a growth process. Before formulating your next step, you’ll have to come to terms with the situation: that this is where you find yourself — deserved, or not.

Then, you can look around and take stock of your situation and begin to assess your options.

Think of Tom Hanks in the film Castaway, marooned on a Pacific island with no shelter, no food, no company, and no way off the island.

Until you accept where you are, your are simply “stuck.” If you’re alone on a deserted island, “How did I get here?” or “Why me?” is truly a dangerous waste of time!

The more helpful question is, “What do I do now?” And where you end up — the difference between somewhere different, or somewhere better — is determined by your ability to first imagine, and then strategize, your desired outcome. What do you need? What do you want?

“The actions we take in reaction to problems are often vastly different than baby steps in service to creating outcomes.”*

David Emerald created The Empowerment Dynamic (TED) as a response to Dr. Stephen Karpman’s classic “Drama Triangle,” which described how humans often respond to perceived threats by adopting the familiar roles of Victim / Persecutor / Rescuer.

As an escape from this cycle, The Empowerment Dynamic creates an alternative response, using the roles of Creator / Challenger / Coach. He proposes thinking of your actions as “baby steps,” asking, “Does this step take me closer or further toward where I want to be?”

David first wrote about the escape from the Drama Triangle in his book “The Power of TED” and now teaches his methods and works with organizations.

His ideas for taking responsibility and accepting control over how you choose to respond to life’s challenges are powerful, and I highly recommend signing up for his newsletter. It’s a great, ongoing reminder and resource for growth.

*“Responding to Challenges With The Empowerment Dynamic” by David Emerald, 2010 https://powerofted.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/RespondingToChallenges.pdf