ADHD Remembering v. Knowing

If you have difficulty with memory, it can be hard to succeed, to change and grow, or to create new habits.

Remembering something means being able to retrieve the information at the right time - when you need it. That coordination is often tricky, particularly when you have ADHD.

You may already have strategies for working with remembering - visual cues, talking about it, and other forms of engaging with it, all help with memory.

But something else has come up for me, and that is the distinction between “remembering” and “knowing.”

As an example: you don’t remember your name; you know it.

And this returns me to a sense I’ve always had: that ADHD is a learning-remediated issue. To do things, we have to learn how, for ourselves.

If you are not remembering information, or not remembering to do something, how could thinking about it as something you want to learn help you?

This will take you into what you know about how you learn anything. You have your ways! You have learned many things, and you do many things. How did you learn? High engagement with multiple paths. Repetition. A social element, maybe. A recognition element, maybe. Personal interest, always a plus. High stakes?

There is one other important element to both memory and learning, and that is attention. We can call it focus; we can call it being present. This is another essential practice for ADHD self-management, meaning that it is impossible to hear, learn, or remember anything if one is lost in thoughts, scenarios, stories, anxieties. ADHD coaching is also a time to practice staying in the present moment, engaging on a topic with the coach, and it is often the first time a person becomes aware how much they are not present in the moment.

As you think about your memory lapses, take it a bit further to delve into the situations in which this happens. Understanding the context will give you information you can use to try new approaches for better results.

And ask: is it about remembering, or could it be about knowing?